After 24 rotations of the sun it’s fair to refer me now as an OWL (Old wise lady). Here are some very important messages of wisdom and interesting factoids for your amusement. Enjoy.
After 24 rotations of the sun it’s fair to refer me now as an OWL (Old wise lady). Here are some very important messages of wisdom and interesting factoids for your amusement. Enjoy.
Like so many other artists Taylor Swift has a bunch of songs that share titles with other songs that were written by someone else. Today they go into battle.
In Taylor Swift’s song has some ominous lyrics about this so called ‘baby’ (who is probably as real as the boyfriend I made up in grade 8, which EVERYONE knew I made up but whatever) is ruined by the fact she says ‘I brought a knife to a gun fight’ in the first verse. What the hell Taylor?
In Foster The People’s version we know from the first bar we’re in for a BOP. The combination of piano and synth and lyrics that I’m not even sure what they’re saying (I just checked and they also mention knives in this song, take that how you will) until they’re telling us to ‘Call It What You Want’ makes this the perfect recipe for a chill tune on a Sunday sesh.
Winner: Foster The People – Their song has you bopping from start to finish whereas Taylor loses you early in.
In Taylor Swift’s story we hear from the perspective of a 14-year-old who has just studied Shakespeare and has been asked to interpret it into modern English. The only problem is Taylor clearly didn’t finish Romeo and Juliet because THEY DIE. THEY LITERALLY BOTH DIE?? I don’t know how she missed that part but she did and it didn’t make it into her song.
I actually listened to 3 other songs called Love Story before I came across a worth competitor, Mariah Carey.
In Mariah’s version it’s like the musical embodiment of a super exclusive bar with low lighting drinking a martini with an olive. But you and I both know Mariah can do better than this. I don’t think a single lyric retained from this song and I started thinking about It’s Like That halfway through because that is an ultimate Mariah tune.
Winner: Taylor Swift – As if you can listen to Taylor’s version without belting out the lyrics and understanding true love from the perspective of a teenager.
Taylor Swift’s 22 has helped create the height of comedy for anyone in their early 20s who clearly posts this song on their friends walls when they hit the age of 22. Taylor makes 22 sound like the ultimate age to be, and as someone who has been 22, she’s not completely wrong. She hasn’t just created a song, but a moment in history.
Lily Allen’s 22 is the polar opposite of Taylor’s song. She brings us all back down to earth by reminding us by the time we’re almost 30 we’re going to be almost as miserable as we were when we were going through our emo phase’s as teens. And you know what, I’m glad Lily is hear to spill that truth tea because sometimes we all need a reminder that our youth is fleeting and you can easily ruin your life in the space of just 8 years.
Winner: Tie – This one was too difficult to split, Taylor really did nail the feeling of 22 but we need Lily to keep us grounded.
Taylor Swift presents us with the perfect song to listen to when your former manager of your not fantastic retail job used to treat you like hell and spend her days complaining about you to your co-workers who happen to also be some of your best friends. Instead of getting mad you can go home, listen to this song and realise that this person is literally a store manager and has reached the age where that’s as far as they’ll go in life (see Lily Allen’s 22) and you’ve still got your whole life ahead of you? I feel inspired even just writing this.
P!nk takes on a different perspective of Mean, where instead of rising above the other bully she admits she is just as guilty of being mean. I assume this song is about her husband (because what P!nk song isn’t about her husband?) and their love-hate relationship. I appreciate that P!nk is trying to fix the situation, sometimes it’s good to admit you’re wrong.
Winner: Taylor Swift – Although P!nk provides us with the a good message of sometimes you need to admit you’re wrong, Taylor Swift looks at the bigger picture of there’s more to life. And she’s so damn right.
You know those moments when you’re in a relationship and you just feel so at peace, everything in your life is so perfect, you might be just lying next to your partner and feeling so satisfied with the whole situation? Good, cause I bloody well don’t and 0/10 cannot relate to Taylor’s version of This Love.
Once again we are presented with the polar opposite of Taylor’s song with Maroon 5’s version of This Love. That guitar riff playing throughout combined with that funky drum beat has you hooked from opening before feeling the passion of Adam who has been WRONGED by this heart breaker (I think? I think that’s what this song is about?). No more goodbyes for Adam.
Winner: Maroon 5 – I can’t relate to either of these songs but Maroon 5 doesn’t have the corny factor like Taylor’s making it ultimately better.
OG Country Taylor Swift has only one mission in life, and it’s to name drop as many people as she possibly can. In this song we’re introduced to Cory who I’m gathering from the lyrics was a very pretty boy. I met a Cory once who didn’t get the hint I wasn’t keen despite the fact my friends and I left him in the beer garden of Rics alone for a good hour. He just sat there drinking his whisky cola waiting…
Following on from The Last Goodnight’s ultimate banger that was Pictures of You, Stay Beautiful doesn’t highlight one specific person which is nice because you can apply it to anyone with their blueish brownish greenish eyes. For all I know this song is about me. In fact, I’m going to take a guess and say it definitely is about me so I will Stay Beautiful thanks.
Winner: The Last Goodbye – Taylor’s song is too specific, suggesting only Cory’s are beautiful. Well guess what Taylor, anyone can be beautiful if they put their mind to it.
Time and time again I’ve been told, by not just locals but people outside of town, that Stanthorpe is a tourist town.
It took me driving an hour north to visit some stunning sunflower fields to realise all of these amazing tourist attractions are right outside my door step.
So I’ve made myself a list of things to do by the end of the year while I’m living it up in the Granite Belt.
To the best of my knowledge no one has ever actually been murdered at Girraween and just because there is no reception doesn’t actually mean my safety is at risk? But getting lost on the dirt tracks of Girraween has somewhat put me off heading back there since my first visit. Next time I’m taking photos of the maps and heading to this lovely park without fear of murder! Hell yeah!
Most people from Brisbane would be familiar with Cedar Creek and Gardener Falls, but just across the border lies the Boonoo Boonoo national park which is known for it’s stunning falls and swimming area.
As someone who loves being around bodies of water (just ask my friends who I dragged out to the dodgiest part of the Brisbane River on my last visit home) it seems like the perfect place to cool off on a hot summer’s day.
Again across the border, I’ve been frequently told Tenterfield is freaking lit in autumn.
As in lit with multi-coloured leaves and just some damn nice serenity.
What would be the point of moving to wine country without sampling ALL of the wine. Yes. ALL THE WINE.
Kidding Mum! (Or am I….)
Besides wine, the granite belt is also known for apples. And what’s apples without cider?
Here’s a handy reminder, if it’s clear and yella you’ve got juice there fella, if it’s tangy and brown you’re in cider town.
Lowkey sort of already did this. But I only did the short walk and saw one of the many waterfalls. So in the words of Ariel from The Little Mermaid “I want more.”
Turns out you don’t have to go to Europe for snow after all. With some predicting this winter to be Australia’s coldest, the chance of snow is likely enough for me to get a wee bit excited (and a wee bit terrified of freezing to death cause your girl does not do well in the cold).
My buddy the moon, the cause of most of my problems and yet the solution to so many. Imagine how lit it’s gonna look through a telescope? There’s an observatory at Ballandean around 20 minutes south of town, so yeah I’m gonna REALLY look at the moon.
Not just regular rocks. Those really big ones that make you go “damn, that’s a big rock.”
I’m gonna find them just you wait.
It’s been 63 days since I left the big smoke and moved to the small town of Stanthorpe.
I always aware of the fact that I would be leaving Brisbane to pursue my career, but there’s nothing that can really prepare you for moving from a city of nearly 2 million to a town of just 5000.
Constantly I was told of how cold it would be as I packed up my life to move to wine country in just two weeks.
I remember driving home from my retail job on the phone to my mum trying so hard not to cry and simultaneously crash. A large group of my friends were already coming to my house that night and it seemed like the perfect chance to give them all the news while I tried to keep it together – somewhat unaware of what I was walking into.
Before I left, I invited just about everyone I knew for one last hurrah at my favourite cafe/bar and had so many people comment on how nice it was to have such a large number people come out for me – despite a few notable absences.
It took me this long to appreciate how easy it was for me to pretty much draw a name out of a hat, call that person up and be like “I’m coming over!”
To go from constantly being surrounded by people I love to just awkwardly hoping someone who I meet for a story will be close to my own age and maybe want to be my friend is the one challenge I don’t think any university degree can prepare you for.
In saying that, there have definitely been a bunch of nice things that I never really had the fortune of enjoying back home.
One of my favourite memories so far since moving here is driving myself out to Storm King Dam – around 10 minutes south of the town – lying on the pier and just looking up at the stars.
It seems corny but there’s no light pollution out here so what you can see is so much brighter and so much more beautiful than you could ever see in a city.
I had the chance to go to my first country show and given I was already a huge fan of the Ekka it was nice to see where all of that starts. It was at this stage where I discovered there isn’t just cows and bulls, but also steers and heifers (which can also be used as somewhat of a nasty insult).
I’ve visited more farms in the past 2 months than I have in my entire life, a highlight being the Nicoletti Orchards where prep-aged Sean told me all about the different apples and trees as we drove around the farm.
I even had the chance to meet a 4-week-old reindeer, something you would NEVER be able to do in a city as they are way too timid (something I never knew about reindeer).
Not to mention, I am constantly given the opportunity to write front page stories. Seeing as there are only two journos in my newsroom it’s something that I don’t even give a second thought, but one of my editors pointed out to me I wouldn’t be given this chance at a larger site.
The people around here for the most part have been very kind and very welcoming.
The produce has this incredible freshness that would not be possible in a metro area.
The parks are filled with more animals than my inner hippy can handle.
The only thing that’s really missing is those strong friendship bonds I’ve leaned on for my entire life.
(and a cinema wtf I wanna see Black Panther).
Currently the record time for Melbourne cup is 3:16 minutes but that happened in the 1990s so assuming we’re looking at about 3:30 minutes I have complied a list of better ways for you to spend your time today which don’t induce animal cruelty nor contribute to the very problematic gambling industry.
When was the last time you wasted a good few minutes playing everyone’s favourite card game?
The great news is because you’ve got a little extra time you don’t have to rush to have them done in two minutes.
That’s at least 35 vines you can watch in that time.
Test your counting skills. See if any of your years of education have paid off for this exact moment.
Apparently you can do it in one song? Go on try it.
No you won’t be able to finish it all in 3:30 minutes so maybe focus on section 44 and try and guess which senator is going to be disqualified next.
Tell that animal you promise to never race it purely for profits because that’s rude.
If your mum picks up you’ll probably be on the phone for much longer than 3:30 minutes. But don’t worry she’s just excited to hear from you.
Congratulations on not participating in this barbaric event! Sorry if that makes you “UnAustralian”
Trump is easy to make fun of because he just continues to say stupid things without actually fact checking.
Thanks John Oliver for letting me know something that hasn’t already been told to us in hundreds of other political commentaries.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past 24 hours you would have either heard this song or at least heard of it.
It appears – and to quote the lyrics – the old Taylor is dead. Which kind of sounds like something I would have said at the ripe age of 14, but never mind.
What’s interesting is the different types of news organisations who have decided to jump on board the Taylor train.
We have the usual crew sharing their opinions including:
And of course,
However, the release of Taylor’s new single has done this weird thing where what would be usually be considered pop culture news, has managed to slip it’s way into more serious news sites including:
Taylor Swift drops new single Look What You Made Me Do
And more surprisingly:
Taylor Swift’s new single Look What You Made Me Do lists Right Said Fred as cowriters
It’s not the first time pop culture and hard hitting news have collided, most commonly seen in celebrity deaths. However it’s paramount to the fact that news is becoming more and more click driven. I mean, why else would the ABC be running this story?
Generally speaking if I’m interested in finding out about music news I would be heading straight to the music websites (or more likely letting them appear on my facebook feed). Brisbane Times isn’t exactly where I’d expect to hear about an artist dropping a new single, and it’s certainly not something I’d be looking for on their website.
But there it is, both Fairfax and the ABC jumping on board the Taylor train in hope of getting even just a small slice of the revenue pie. And considering I clicked on and read both of these articles, I guess it’s working.
But also anyone who hasn’t registered to vote yet please do so!
You know, that reef that is valued at $56 billion dollars and is currently being harmed by crown-of-thorns starfish and mining giants? What if we just… did more to protect it? Classic.
The 2011 census states there are over 100,000 homeless people in Australia, but more recent data suggests there could be up to 300,000 people sleeping rough. Imagine if we built more social housing to help home some of these people?
That train which for years everyone’s been like “we’re gonna build it! we’re gonna do it!” Yeah it’s gonna cost a lot more than $122 million but what if we actually started to invest in it?
I don’t know why, but I hear people talk about it a lot. So why the hell not, lets get some more airports.
While we’re on the topic of flying, why not just go into outer space while we’re at it. (Except the moon, don’t go there)
Because that’s equally as ridiculous as spending $122 million on a NON-BINDING postal vote for marriage equality which is something that could just be passed in parliament because that’s literally what we elect politicians to do?
Like all the other big things we have but it’s a rainbow.
Being in your twenties is a complicated time. It’s a time where you’re starting to discover who you are while often juggling work, study, family, friends and relationships. It can start to be a bit overwhelming.
Any new relationship can be scary, fun and enticing at the same time. But if there was any clue as to the likeliness of your relationship working out, wouldn’t you want to know it?
For some, they choose to look to the star, to see if the astrology of their potential partner is an indicator of whether or not they are compatible. Sometimes it is just an afterthought, like when you break up with someone and say to yourself “oh well, he was a Taurus, so it’s no wonder things didn’t work out!”
However, there really is no substantial evidence as to whether astrology is accurate or not. Vlogger and biologist Hank Green took to Twitter saying “astrology is not a thing, but if it helps people analyse themselves and ponder their decisions and their future.”
Like astrology…astrology is not a thing, but if it helps people analyze themselves and ponder their decisions and their future, who cares?
— Hank Green 🐢 (@hankgreen) April 23, 2016
Although Hank Green has a science background, he has no specific knowledge in Astrology. But with a large online following his words always have a wide reach. Other well known scientists, including ethologist Richard Dawkins, have gone out of their way to publicly pronounce there is no scientific evidence that links the placement of the cosmos to the likeliness of life events.
Professor at The University of Essex, Nick Allum, adds that it is common for people to confuse astrology with science. He argues there is often a confusion between astronomy and astrology, not just because of the similar names, but also due to the similarity in the study.
For professional astrologers, scientific evidence is not necessary, as astrology is largely regarded as a belief system. For each astrologer, how they go about this belief system simply depends on their own undertakings of the study.
Professional astrologer Ashtara, says her work is deeply psychological with a spiritual undertone.
“I like to work with my clients on a soul level rather than superficially,” she said.
Her knowledge on the compatibility between different signs makes her an asset to those trying to figure out their own compatibility.
Given the chance to know the likeliness of a potential relationship working out, six eager volunteers agreed to go on blind dates to find out if what the stars say is true.
“First thought for me was he looks a lot better than the photos,” Chloe said with a laugh after her blind date with Alex.
“From the start he was really easy to talk to.”
Alex, an engineering student described Chloe as ‘colourful’ after seeing her bright pink hair for the first time. Initially he was taken aback by Chloe, but when the conversation started flowing everything changed.
“Once we started talking we had a lot in common,” Alex said.
“It was a surprise.”
“I feel like on an intellectual level there was a very good connection, and he was pretty cute,” Chloe said with a big grin on her face. After going on what both of them considered to be a good first date, Alex and Chloe were stumped to think of things they disliked about each other. Alex looked up to the right in recollection, but failed to think of anything. Similarly, Chloe couldn’t fault Alex.
“I guess, there’s nothing I don’t particularly like, it’s the just the fact that, I don’t know what will happen next?” Chloe said. “If there’s something about him that I don’t like, then not yet.”
From just one meeting Alex was able to speak of Chloe in high regard, describing her as smart but ‘not just textbook smart’. Chloe admired Alex’s commitment to detail.
“He had a trait that I really liked. He tried, he tried to dress himself nicely,” she said.
“[I like] people who present themselves nicely, they [and] put effort into their lives,
“I like people who know what they want and go for it. That’s something I like about him, and in general.”
Astrologer Ashtara says the two fire signs, Leo and Sagittarius can easily generate a love.
“Sagittarius will need freedom to explore whereas Leo may want to lead the exploration,” she said.
“The two together can get on well provided each respects the other’s personal space, and spiritual and religious beliefs.”
When Danni and Saxon met there was an instant connection. However unlike Alex and Chloe, this connection was not of the romantic nature.
“I thought she was pretty cool, chill, relaxed,” Saxon said speaking of his initial impression of Danni. They found they were able to get along well from the get go.
“He’s very open, he’s very friendly,” Danni said regarding Saxon.
“I think we are definitely compatible, we have a lot in common a lot of the same interests, we are both very easy going and have a similar sense of humour.”
After spending time together Saxon described Danni as nice and relaxed.
“[Danni’s] not one of those people who were just jumping all over the conversations,” he said.
Despite admiring many of Danni’s qualities, Saxon didn’t feel as they could be anything more than just friends. He reflected on what differed Danni from the sort of person he would normally date.
“It’s hard because I’ve never really thought about that sort of thing,” he said after a long pause.
Danni’s reaction was similar. After stopping to think for a while, she said she preferred to date people who were more independent. Saxon being her junior by two years definitely had an influence on her impression.
“Humour is definitely a big one, I can’t date someone without a sense of humour… I like people to be really friendly and not uptight,” she said.
On terms of compatibility, they sat on the same page.
“As friends yeah, anything more than that no,” Saxon said.
As for seeing each other again? “Yes! Probably not in a romantic aspect, just as friends,” Danni said with a laugh.
Ashtara says the earth sign, Taurus, and air sign, Libra, have the ability to get along really well.
“[They] can experience a harmonious and balanced relationship, especially when their values are aligned,” she said.
Just like any two strangers meeting for the first time, Lizzy and Jacob were eager to see how their blind date would go.
“I was just really scared,” Lizzy said nervously laughing.
Both Jacob and Lizzy were really stuck for words to describe their date.
“It was fun,” Lizzy said without much else to elaborate on. Jacob described the experience as “pretty chill” but didn’t offer any further detail. It was obvious the two of them were trying to be nice, but there was no obvious connection.
Initially Lizzy didn’t have much to say about how compatible she felt with Jacob.
“It’s so hard to make that assumption from just looking at someone,” she said.
“He just seemed really kind.”
Similarly, Jacob couldn’t find the words to describe how he felt initially.
“I honestly couldn’t say, it wasn’t something that crossed my mind at that point,” he said.
Although Lizzy didn’t have anything bad to say about Jacob, she barely had anything overtly positive to say.
“I don’t know, I thought he was cool,” she said, unable to think of anything else.
In spite of Jacob not feeling a strong connection with Lizzy, he didn’t want to completely rule out the possibility.
“I wouldn’t say fully [compatible],” he said.
“The conversation sort of died off towards the end, but I suppose that’s normal for someone you just met,
“I didn’t feel like there was really anything special there, but it was still a nice time.”
In terms of whether they would want to see each other again, neither had a definitive answer. Lizzy said she would maybe want to see Jacob, whereas Jacob said maybe in a social context.
Ashtara explained that Virgo and Aries have very different personalities.
“Virgo, an earth sign is usually practical and efficient, absorbed in task,” she said.
“Aries, a fire sign, can be impulsive and think only of self,
“The relationship could work well if Virgo works with the detail and routine of everyday living while Aries pursues activities.”
Co-Written by Gemma Edwards
Seriously, have you ever been with a group of friends trying to decide where to eat and had someone say, “why don’t we check out one of those restaurants on the moon?” No. Because the moon has a terrible selection of food. Not to mention they don’t cater to ANY dietary requirements.
I hope you like adult diapers because that’s what you’re going to be wearing if you head to the moon – and not in a kinky way. They don’t even have drop toilets on the moon, that’s how backwards it is!
You think it takes ages to get to Europe? Around 20 hours flying time? Well guess what, it takes THREE DAYS to get to the moon. So not even worth the travel time.
Spacesuits really hit their peak in the 60’s when they were shiny, silver, and the height of fashion. These days, they’re just boring and “practical”, definitely not instagramable.
Think it’s cold when it’s only 2 degrees in the morning? What about when it hits negatives and it’s -5 c? WELL GUESS WHAT?! The moon gets to around negative 233 c! Absolutely freezing! You’d need at least 50 coats!
Even if you did want to instagram your trip to the moon (like you would, the food sucks and so does the fashion) you couldn’t anyways because they haven’t discovered this little thing called “the internet”. So pathetic.
Honestly, why did I even bother bringing this candle with me? The moon is so inconsiderate.
You know when you break up with someone and you’re like “I’m swearing off humans for good, they’re just the worst!” Wake up Sharon! Aliens can be assholes too!
Oh my god, don’t even bother waiting for your train! It’s not showing up. There aren’t even train tracks on the moon. And don’t get me started on buses.
You know that one real estate agent who you’ve always kind of hated because of the fact they said you can’t have pets? Yeah, the moon is even worse. You can’t have one single thing that’s good so why even bother going?