Thoughts

Better things the government could spend $122 million on than a postal vote for same sex marriage which could literally just be passed in parliament

But also anyone who hasn’t registered to vote yet please do so!

 http://www.aec.gov.au/enrol/

1. Protecting the Great Barrier Reef

(source: nerdhonesty.tumblr.com)

You know, that reef that is valued at $56 billion dollars and is currently being harmed by crown-of-thorns starfish and mining giants? What if we just… did more to protect it? Classic.

2. Housing for the homeless


(source: upworthy.com)

The 2011 census states there are over 100,000 homeless people in Australia, but more recent data suggests there could be up to 300,000 people sleeping rough. Imagine if we built more social housing to help home some of these people?

3. East Coast Railway


(source: wifflegif.com)

That train which for years everyone’s been like “we’re gonna build it! we’re gonna do it!” Yeah it’s gonna cost a lot more than $122 million but what if we actually started to invest in it?

4. More airports


(source: laughtilldeathh.tumblr.com)

I don’t know why, but I hear people talk about it a lot. So why the hell not, lets get some more airports.

5. A new space station


(source: thats-n0-moon.tumblr.com)

While we’re on the topic of flying, why not just go into outer space while we’re at it. (Except the moon, don’t go there)

6. Flying monkeys

(source: totalfilm.tumblr.com)

Because that’s equally as ridiculous as spending $122 million on a NON-BINDING postal vote for marriage equality which is something that could just be passed in parliament because that’s literally what we elect politicians to do?

7. The big rainbow


(source: cigarettesandsmile.tumblr.com)

Like all the other big things we have but it’s a rainbow.

Was it in the stars?

Being in your twenties is a complicated time. It’s a time where you’re starting to discover who you are while often juggling work, study, family, friends and relationships. It can start to be a bit overwhelming.  

Any new relationship can be scary, fun and enticing at the same time. But if there was any clue as to the likeliness of your relationship working out, wouldn’t you want to know it? 


(source: giphy.com)

For some, they choose to look to the star, to see if the astrology of their potential partner is an indicator of whether or not they are compatible. Sometimes it is just an afterthought, like when you break up with someone and say to yourself “oh well, he was a Taurus, so it’s no wonder things didn’t work out!”

However, there really is no substantial evidence as to whether astrology is accurate or not. Vlogger and biologist Hank Green took to Twitter saying “astrology is not a thing, but if it helps people analyse themselves and ponder their decisions and their future.”

Although Hank Green has a science background, he has no specific knowledge in Astrology. But with a large online following his words always have a wide reach. Other well known scientists, including ethologist Richard Dawkins, have gone out of their way to publicly pronounce there is no scientific evidence that links the placement of the cosmos to the likeliness of life events. 

Professor at The University of Essex, Nick Allum, adds that it is common for people to confuse astrology with science. He argues there is often a confusion between astronomy and astrology, not just because of the similar names, but also due to the similarity in the study.


(source: dianapietrzykd.com)

For professional astrologers, scientific evidence is not necessary, as astrology is largely regarded as a belief system.  For each astrologer, how they go about this belief system simply depends on their own undertakings of the study.

Professional astrologer Ashtara, says her work is deeply psychological with a spiritual undertone.

“I like to work with my clients on a soul level rather than superficially,” she said.

Her knowledge on the compatibility between different signs makes her an asset to those trying to figure out their own compatibility.

Given the chance to know the likeliness of a potential relationship working out, six eager volunteers agreed to go on blind dates to find out if what the stars say is true.

Alex, 19, Engineering Student + Chloe, 19, Design Student

Sagittarius and Leo  – The Perfect Match

(source: iscreamsundae.com)

“First thought for me was he looks a lot better than the photos,” Chloe said with a laugh after her blind date with Alex.
“From the start he was really easy to talk to.”

Alex, an engineering student described Chloe as ‘colourful’ after seeing her bright pink hair for the first time. Initially he was taken aback by Chloe, but when the conversation started flowing everything changed. 

“Once we started talking we had a lot in common,” Alex said.
“It was a surprise.”

“I feel like on an intellectual level there was a very good connection, and he was pretty cute,” Chloe said with a big grin on her face.  After going on what both of them considered to be a good first date, Alex and Chloe were stumped to think of things they disliked about each other. Alex looked up to the right in recollection, but failed to think of anything. Similarly, Chloe couldn’t fault Alex. 

“I guess, there’s nothing I don’t particularly like, it’s the just the fact that, I don’t know what will happen next?” Chloe said. “If there’s something about him that I don’t like, then not yet.”

From just one meeting Alex was able to speak of Chloe in high regard, describing her as smart but ‘not just textbook smart’.  Chloe admired Alex’s commitment to detail.

“He had a trait that I really liked. He tried, he tried to dress himself nicely,” she said.

“[I like] people who present themselves nicely, they [and] put effort into their lives,

“I like people who know what they want and go for it. That’s something I like about him, and in general.”

Astrologer Ashtara says the two fire signs, Leo and Sagittarius can easily generate a love.

“Sagittarius will need freedom to explore whereas Leo may want to lead the exploration,” she said.

“The two together can get on well provided each respects the other’s personal space, and spiritual and religious beliefs.”

Saxon, 19, Creative Industries Student + Danni, 21, Photographer

Libra and Taurus – The Wild Card Match

(source: imgur.com)

When Danni and Saxon met there was an instant connection. However unlike Alex and Chloe, this connection was not of the romantic nature.

“I thought she was pretty cool, chill, relaxed,” Saxon said speaking of his initial impression of Danni. They found they were able to get along well from the get go. 

“He’s very open, he’s very friendly,” Danni said regarding Saxon.
“I think we are definitely compatible, we have a lot in common a lot of the same interests, we are both very easy going and have a similar sense of humour.”

After spending time together Saxon described Danni as nice and relaxed.

“[Danni’s] not one of those people who were just jumping all over the conversations,” he said.

Despite admiring many of Danni’s qualities, Saxon didn’t feel as they could be anything more than just friends.  He reflected on what differed Danni from the sort of person he would normally date.

“It’s hard because I’ve never really thought about that sort of thing,” he said after a long pause.

Danni’s reaction was similar. After stopping to think for a while, she said she preferred to date people who were more independent. Saxon being her junior by two years definitely had an influence on her impression.

“Humour is definitely a big one, I can’t date someone without a sense of humour… I like people to be really friendly and not uptight,” she said.

On terms of compatibility, they sat on the same page.

“As friends yeah, anything more than that no,” Saxon said.

As for seeing each other again? “Yes! Probably not in a romantic aspect, just as friends,” Danni said with a laugh.

Ashtara says the earth sign, Taurus, and air sign, Libra, have the ability to get along really well.

“[They] can experience a harmonious and balanced relationship, especially when their values are aligned,” she said.

Jacob, 20, Content Producer + Lizzy, 20, Speech Pathology Student

Virgo and Aries – The Bad Match

(source: afv.com) 

Just like any two strangers meeting for the first time, Lizzy and Jacob were eager to see how their blind date would go. 

“I was just really scared,” Lizzy said nervously laughing. 

Both Jacob and Lizzy were really stuck for words to describe their date.

“It was fun,” Lizzy said without much else to elaborate on. Jacob described the experience as “pretty chill” but didn’t offer any further detail. It was obvious the two of them were trying to be nice, but there was no obvious connection.   

Initially Lizzy didn’t have much to say about how compatible she felt with Jacob.

“It’s so hard to make that assumption from just looking at someone,” she said.

“He just seemed really kind.”

Similarly, Jacob couldn’t find the words to describe how he felt initially.

“I honestly couldn’t say, it wasn’t something that crossed my mind at that point,” he said.

Although Lizzy didn’t have anything bad to say about Jacob, she barely had anything overtly positive to say.

“I don’t know, I thought he was cool,” she said, unable to think of anything else.

In spite of Jacob not feeling a strong connection with Lizzy, he didn’t want to completely rule out the possibility.

“I wouldn’t say fully [compatible],” he said.

“The conversation sort of died off towards the end, but I suppose that’s normal for someone you just met,

“I didn’t feel like there was really anything special there, but it was still a nice time.”

In terms of whether they would want to see each other again, neither had a definitive answer. Lizzy said she would maybe want to see Jacob, whereas Jacob said maybe in a social context.

Ashtara explained that Virgo and Aries have very different personalities.

“Virgo, an earth sign is usually practical and efficient, absorbed in task,” she said.

“Aries, a fire sign, can be impulsive and think only of self,

“The relationship could work well if Virgo works with the detail and routine of everyday living while Aries pursues activities.”

10 reasons you SHOULDN’T go to the moon

Co-Written by Gemma Edwards

1. The food is bad


(source: mashable.com) 

Seriously, have you ever been with a group of friends trying to decide where to eat and had someone say, “why don’t we check out one of those restaurants on the moon?” No. Because the moon has a terrible selection of food. Not to mention they don’t cater to ANY dietary requirements.

2. There’s no where to pee


(source: imgur.com) 

I hope you like adult diapers because that’s what you’re going to be wearing if you head to the moon – and not in a kinky way. They don’t even have drop toilets on the moon, that’s how backwards it is!

3. It takes ages to get there


(source: imgur.com)

You think it takes ages to get to Europe? Around 20 hours flying time? Well guess what, it takes THREE DAYS to get to the moon. So not even worth the travel time.

4. Spacesuits aren’t cool anymore


(source: nasa.com)

Spacesuits really hit their peak in the 60’s when they were shiny, silver, and the height of fashion. These days, they’re just boring and “practical”, definitely not instagramable.

5. It’s really cold


(source: SYFY.com) 

Think it’s cold when it’s only 2 degrees in the morning? What about when it hits negatives and it’s -5 c? WELL GUESS WHAT?! The moon gets to around negative 233 c! Absolutely freezing! You’d need at least 50 coats!

6. There’s no wifi


(source: comedycentral.com) 

Even if you did want to instagram your trip to the moon (like you would, the food sucks and so does the fashion) you couldn’t anyways because they haven’t discovered this little thing called “the internet”. So pathetic.

7. Whenever you light your vanilla-spy candle it goes out straight away so you don’t get a good whiff


(source: reddit.com) 

Honestly, why did I even bother bringing this candle with me? The moon is so inconsiderate.

8. Aliens can be dicks


(source: simpsonsworld.com)

You know when you break up with someone and you’re like “I’m swearing off humans for good, they’re just the worst!” Wake up Sharon! Aliens can be assholes too!

9. Public transport is unreliable


(source: giphy.com) 

Oh my god, don’t even bother waiting for your train! It’s not showing up. There aren’t even train tracks on the moon. And don’t get me started on buses.

10. You can’t have pets


(source: hercampus.com) 

You know that one real estate agent who you’ve always kind of hated because of the fact they said you can’t have pets? Yeah, the moon is even worse. You can’t have one single thing that’s good so why even bother going?

Please take me seriously

Elle Woods is one of my all time favourite movie characters. Not just because Legally Blonde is full of classic one liners, or the fact it introduced me to the “Bend and Snap.” But because despite the fact that so many people made snap judgements about Elle based purely on appearance and personality, she was still able to strive for success.

I relate a lot to her. There is no reason why Elle shouldn’t have got into Harvard. She has a 4.0 GPA – the equivalent to straight 7’s or HDs. That’s amazing. And it doesn’t matter what course you’re studying, every career path is just as valuable as each other. Without fashion students we wouldn’t have wardrobes full of clothes. Without film students the cinemas would be empty. Those sorts of grades are amazing no matter what you study.

Elle got a 179 on the LSATs. I know from watching Suits, getting that kind of score is next to impossible. So once again, Elle is incredible!  But people just look at her, see blonde, boobs, and over-the-top girly. And that’s it, a judgement is made and everything else is totally disregarded.


(source: giphy.com)

I remember last year in one of my lectures, while I was going through my rainbow hair stage, the lecturer looked right at me as she suggested to the class a story on “why is purple hair still a thing” was a good idea.

I’m pretty notoriously late to social events. People who’ve known me for a while know to give me a time half an hour earlier than I’m actually meant to be there and so there’s a chance I may show up on time. On more than one occasion people have told me if I didn’t spend so much time on my makeup and appearance I wouldn’t be so late to things.

I really like making people laugh. I don’t mind being the butt of jokes if it means I can put a smile on someone’s face. Sometimes I’ll say the stupidest things out loud without really thinking it through first, at the chance it might make someone laugh. If I’m the class clown then I’m totally fine with that. Really the entirety of blog is a prime example of that.


(source: tumblr.com)

But I guess there’s a side to me a lot of people don’t see. I’m no Elle Woods, but my GPA isn’t bad. The course I’m currently studying required an OP 6 to get in. I spend three years studying the International Baccalaureate which in short, is really fucking hard.  I’m not saying I’m some kind of prodigy genius – that couldn’t be any less from the truth – but people have a tendency to just look at me and make a snap judgement.

Nearly everyone I’ve encountered in my course works really hard. I’m missing 5 weeks of classes out of a 12 week semester from doing extra work and internships. While interning at Channel Ten, there wasn’t a single day I was late. In fact most days I seriously overcompensated for traffic and got in before any of the actual journalists. I guess no one there really questioned how I’d done my hair and make up because of the fact that most days you end up standing in front of a camera. Also no one ever really questioned how serious I was because I pretty much got thrown into actually working for them when Cyclone Debbie hit.

Although no one’s ever really directly said it, I’ve definitely had people imply I may not be suited to hard news. You know, without ever actually seeing any sort of hard news I’ve produced. I guess they read some of my posts here and decide you can’t be writing Buzzfeed style listicles and also be able to report on things like murder cases? (I would post a link here to my Tialeigh Palmer story but my voice is really bad, so better not). 

In reality, I don’t know where I’m going to end up at the end of this year. I have 6 months left and then it’s out into the real world.  All I can hope is people out there in the real world know, no matter what my hair colour is, no matter how much make up I feel like wearing that day, no matter what stupid shit post I come up with next, I should be taken just as seriously as anyone else out there.

Oh and here’s a pelican yawning cause this post got too real.


(source: reddit.com)

Look we all already know who won…

Are you a European song contest? Cause you’re a vision!

THE VERY REAL AND NOT ENTIRELY MADE UP BUDGET: LEAKED!!!

The Australian Federal Government will be releasing the nations budget this evening, but luckily due to my mind reading and precognition abilities I am able to bring to you now, an in depth analysis of winners and losers of this very very real budget.

THE WINNERS

Coffee lovers everywhere are rejoicing as the government will now be subsidising one large coffee per person per work day to help maintain productivity, especially for the early starters. For the sick people who don’t like coffee, the subsidy can also be used on other cafe beverages such as Chai Lattes or the Humble Hot Chocolate.


(source: junkee.com)

A more controversial winner is Australia’s beloved Ibis’s, more commonly known as Bin Chickens. The $2 billion Bin Chicken Break will provide the long beaked fowls with extra bins across the nation filled with juices, reminiscent of their previous homes.

Those studying for the citizenship test can count their blessings, although some say it’s a bloody outrage, with $400,000 going towards a colloquialism training course. The course will have future Australian’s asking you to chuck a u-ey at the servo to drop into the bottle-o on the way to maccas before you open your first tinny of the night.


(source: buzzfeed.com) 

The forcibly removed tax is the most controversial of them all. It’ll allow airlines to remove four taxes from their flights and replace them with the employee tax. What is shocking is the means in which airlines will be allowed to remove the taxes. Airport security is permitted to drag the taxes down the plane aisles, leaving them bloodied and beaten. Taxes wearing leggings will also be prevented from boarding.

THE LOSERS

The bigoted Australian’s will be the hardest hit by this new budget, with the sexism tax jumping to a massive 23 cents per dollar for businesses that pay based on gender. Similarly the racists of our nation will be carrying a whopping 15% tax for their inability to perform actual human decency.

Coriander lovers (the whole 12 of them) are really going to feel it in their back pocket as the prestigious herb see’s a special unwanted flavouring tax costing Australian’s who purchase the herb a minimum of $20 per leaf. Kale lovers will also suffer, though the more commonly eaten purple leaf will only see a 20 cent increase per leaf. 


(source: videezy.com) 

The department of self-realisation is suffering a massive hit with $50 million of funding being cut from the “self-discovery” program which sent many Instagram bloggers over to asian countries to “experience culture” and become more self-aware.  The program already came under scrutiny when a twenty-year-old female recently returned from India without feeling anymore in tune with her spirit.


(source: buzzfeed.com)

And finally, Clive Palmer is one of the biggest losers this budget with the new dog grog tax which will see an extra 11% tax on dog specific alcohol.
Disgusted
Watermelon wine
Dog is on the grog
No more
Hamburger

Lightning McQueen: A Car, An Assassin, A Vigilante.

Whether its that dash of red zooming past on the race course, or the bright yellow 95 above the lightning bolt, or the distinctive sound of Ka-Chow, Lighning McQueen is one recognisable vehicle.

Mr. McQueen has touched many lives through his inspiring journey on and off the race course since his silver screen debut in 2006.  However there is a side to the anthropomorphic stock car which many of us have never seen.  A close friend of McQueen, Jo O’Neill, has revealed never before heard information about their four-wheeled friend.


(source: wikipedia.com) 

Jo first met McQueen during primary school education, and although most of the other participants were of a young age, McQueen was something special.

“He’s actually an immortal being and has never been a child, and he will never be elderly,” Jo said.

It makes life tough for McQueen as none of McQueen’s friends, human or automotive, have suffered the same fate.

“He has to carry this burden alone.”

It saddens Jo to talk about the fact McQueen’s predicament of never ageing extends beyond his friendships and into his romantic life.

“He actually has an irresistible sexual aura that overpowers everyone around him so he has chosen to remain celibate so as to avoid taking advantage of anyone.”

Just like any regular human or car, sometimes the loneliness can become too much. McQueen has a dark secret. His deepest discomposure is framed with a gun loaded with a silver bullet.

“He killed Abraham Lincoln”

Although shocking to hear, McQueens assassination history was paramount to the filming of the most recent Cars movie. Using the same method as with Lincoln, McQueen was required to kill an evil version of himself from an alternate universe.

“It wasn’t actually supposed to be in the film but the evil clone showed up and McQueen had to,

“He’s a hero of the people but he isn’t afraid to get his hands dirty,

“Sometimes you need a vigilante to do what a clean cut hero won’t.”

Although Jo does not have much opportunity to see McQueen outside of big family events and drag races these days, Jo describes every moment spent with him as euphoric.

“The english language is far too inferior to explain the essence of Mr. McQueen.”

To Jo, childhood friend McQueen will never be just like any other car.

“He’s a car with a face that can talk”

And now the world knows, he’s also a hero.

Solid Travel Advice I Sent My Friend When I Was Drunk

Picture this, late on a Thursday night, several drinks in (I would hate to count) preparing myself for the long weekend. Suddenly, I am reminded my friend is boarding on a plane the next day, so the obvious response would be to send a long winded list of travelling tips, from me, someone who’s gone ~ travelling ~ once in my life.

Turns out I give great advice so it would be selfish for me to only share with one person. Here’s the version without all the typos (and oddly placed emojis) and a little extra on what sober me thinks drunk me was going on about.

1. Don’t let them kick you off the plane


(source: frinkiac.com)

Timely, considering the whole United Airways situation.

2. Take loads of photos, sell them on the internet


(source: hulu.com) 

The specific amount mentioned was 10$ but I’m not sure if it’s meant to be 10 photos or selling them for $10. The world works in mysterious ways.

3. Return a changed man, have a sportily reawaken (???)


(source: youblewit.bandcamp.com)

I mean this is just in general good advice for going anywhere. As for a sportily reawaken? I can only assume this means finding yourself through sport. An odd concept but I support it.

4. Don’t remove any organs


(source: peteneems.com)

I’d apply this to every organ except for the appendix, if you want that gone be my guest.

5. Prepare the PowerPoint for when you get back with all the photos and lots of stuff to talk about


(source: robertosgifs.com)

Keynote and Prezi are also acceptable forms of this assignment I’m now setting for everyone. Please use APA referencing.

6. Don’t!!! Di3!!!


(source: bantampsycho.tumblr.com)

I think the most important part of this is the use of the number 3. It takes it from a standard message of not dying and triples it.

7. Don’t volunteer to fly the plane. This is not going to end well you don’t have your pilot license. DO NOT FLY THE PLANE YOU HAVEN’T TAKEN THE PILOT TEST WOW I can’t fucking believe you would just fly a plane.


(source: reddit.com) 

If you are a pilot, skip this step.

8. Don’t sell your soul for $5


(source: frinkiac.com) 

We can all learn from Bart Simpson.

9. Do sell finger nail clippings


(source: giphy.com)

Look this is just down right terrible advice, please don’t do this.

10. Have the tea but not the one laced with cocaine, oh no that’s how you get a drug addiction such a bright future and all ruined with the drugs very sad story


(source: diditmarketing.tumblr.com) 

I mean it’s probably best to avoid tea laced with cocaine but between you and me, I don’t think I know how drug addiction works….

11. Don’t give birth while you’re there it won’t be ideal just avoid at all costs, if you want to give birth do it in New Zealand


(source: comicvine.com)

I’m not sure why New Zealand is the right country to be giving birth but I trust myself enough to go with it.

12. Fly safe blimpy boy


(source: simpsonsworld.com) 

Someone (me) has been watching way too much Simpsons lately.