A medium haul flight is defined as any flight between the length of 3-6 hours.
Now this ain’t my first rodeo – and by rodeo I mean medium haul flight – taking a solid 5 hours to reach my destination of Western Australia, I had myself well prepped for the expedition ahead of me.
Now everyone has different preferences as to how they like to fly, mine are as follows:
- Window Seat – I like to leave against the corner of the wall and the seat and get comfy in a weird crouched position
- Warm Clothes – I freeze like you wouldn’t believe on planes
- Entertainment – An obvious one, but I tend to come prepared with my own shows just in case I don’t like the selection
Being my third time this year that I’ve ventured over to the West Coast, I had my check list all sorted and was ready for an as comfortable as possible economy class flight. My seat was picked, my clothes as warm as the summer heat would allow, and my phone cleared out to make room for my current Netflix show of choice, Mad Men.
I arrived at the airport with just enough time for myself and my carry-on to make it onto the plane and as per usual despite the way the numbers are called people all pushed their way through the gates with little old me being shoved back behind the masses of people who decided their seats were more important than mine. Here’s a hint to you people, the sooner you get on the plane the longer you’re waiting to take off, idiots.
I finally managed to get onto the plane, despite being in the first group of people called, and as I treaded down the aisle counting the rows, 32, 33, 34, finally approaching my seat – 35K – to notice something not quiet right.
Someone else was in my seat.
I looked at the numbers again as I’ve been known to stuff up the rows before, but I definitely had reached row 35 and in seat K sat a 20 something blonde surfer dude dressed in the most hideous cargo shorts, t-shirt and snapback combination, sitting next to this girl the tiniest denim shorts you ever saw and a singlet top.
No problem, I thought to myself, I’ll just check if they got the numbers right. I say to the pair “hey sorry, which seat did you guys have?” and before I could even finish my sentence the girl cut me off stating “Oh yeah we actually had the two aisle seats but we’re traveling together so we wanted to sit together.”
I stood there a bit confused as to why the two of them hadn’t simply booked their seats together in the first place rather than taking my window seat that I had specifically planned for.
“Hope that’s okay” the girl says to me pointing me towards the empty seat in the middle aisle. Being the person I am, I stupidly agreed to let them have my seat, quickly regretting this decision after receiving no thanks for giving up number one on my checklist, the window seat.
I further begin to regret my decision as I notice I am seated next to a young girl who couldn’t be any older than 4, with her father and sister beside her. Behind me, sat a young couple with 3 children, all clearly under the age of 5 including one baby, who I listened to the air hostess reassure the couple that it was normal for the baby to cry.
Still my five hours weren’t to be completely ruined as I’d taken advantage of Netflix’s download feature and had prepped myself with entertainment for the flight, clearing my small storaged phone of many photos and songs to make way for my 5 episodes of Mad Men.
Turns out all of this was a waste as not only had I managed to be seated on a plane with a built in entertainment system, this built in entertainment system in fact featured the 5 episodes of the show I had planned on watching. Still, not the end of the world, just that if I got bored of my show I didn’t have any of the fun apps and music to turn to as I’d deleted them all to make space for my show.
As the plane took off, reached the sky, and the seatbelt sign was switched off, the father of the girl sitting next to told her to lie down and have a sleep. Luckily, being small she didn’t take up much more than her own seat. That was until she fell into a deep sleep and began to twitch, causing a little foot to kick my leg at various times throughout the embarkment.
Still no matter, at least I had my warmth? I retrieved my cardigan from my carry-on as the plane got higher and the temperature lowered. To my distress as I put on my cardigan I noticed a giant hole right where the arm attaches. Not a small hole, a giant hole that barely kept my sleeve connected.
I’d lost my window seat, my entertainment was interrupted by constant kicks from a tiny foot, and my warmth was compromised. All three requirements from my checklist, destroyed. My flight, jeopardised. A most horrific expedition across the country.
All I can hope now is the flight home isn’t nearly as painful and everything goes according to plan.